As I’m writing this, I’m currently wrapping up my third week post op from a surgery I’ve been dreaming about: hysterectomy. Huzzah!
If you’re reading this, you’re no doubt considering what tips you should have prepared for this experience or how you can better support your loved one through this.
Let me make this clear: this is not a hit piece about uteruses. They are amazing organs! Without them, humankind would be a lot less… well, alive. For a vast majority of people, their uterus and reproductive system are a point of connection to ancestors long passed, to their personal divinity, or religious, cultural, or political communities. That’s okay!
I’ve just known from a young age that I didn’t want children, and often experienced debilitating pain from cramps. I didn’t understand why it wasn’t easier for me to request surgery to remove something so inconvenient for me, like removing a finicky gallbladder.
It sucked!
Luckily, being trans has some perks and being taken seriously for this kind of surgery is one of them. I spent a few years trying to find alternatives to solving the pain, but when I tried them all and requested a hysterectomy, my surgeon agreed. She will likely never read this, but I am immensely grateful for her respect of my autonomy, and that she never assumed I’d want it removed just because I was trans. Thank you!
Now, I’ve learned some tips from the healing process that I haven’t seen elsewhere, and would like to share them!
I hope that someone is spared a little bit of pain or discomfort from this article.
Contents
- 1 Tips to Prepare In Advance
- 1.1 Make everything accessible before you go under the knife.
- 1.2 Prepare LOTS of easy-to-grab snacks
- 1.3 Think about what you’re eating the day before surgery!
- 1.4 Take some time to meal prep a TON of meals that can be frozen.
- 1.5 Get ready to sleep on your back a lot.
- 1.6 Prepare your outfit essentials!
- 1.7 Do a deep clean a couple of days before surgery!
- 1.8 Prepare your media menu beforehand!
- 2 Tips for After Surgery
Tips to Prepare In Advance
Make everything accessible before you go under the knife.
Regardless of the type of hysterectomy you get, you won’t be able to lift stuff heavier than 2lbs, or bend over easily without putting strain on your incisions. Start walking around your home and think about what you need to adjust in order to avoid heavy lifting or bending.
Like, do you have a heavy box of cat food you usually need to lift up to feed Mr. Whiskers? Put it into smaller containers in a place where you don’t have to squat down to get it.
Do you keep all your underwear at the very bottom of your closet? Move it up or put it in bins on your desk!
Despite my height, my mom is quite short and regularly uses those grabby metal hands to reach for things. She lent me one, and it’s been vital for me especially when I just got comfy and dropped the remote on the floor again.
Consider borrowing one from your short mom if you can! (Or just buy one from the store, maybe you have a tall mom, IDK.)
Prepare LOTS of easy-to-grab snacks
Prioritize fibre, protein, and ease. Stuff like roasted chickpeas can be bought or easily made for a tasty nutritious snack. You can season them, sprinkle them on toast + hummus, or eat them like trail mix. (Be careful because they have a lot of fibre in a small amount!)
Consider getting a bunch of easy snacks like granola bars or muffins. Sometimes you just need to eat something quickly in the middle of the night, and that’s where stuff like this comes in handy. Make some in advance, and freeze them for later use!
If you eat eggs, hard-boil a bunch and store them in the fridge, you can even pickle them to last longer. Or make a bunch of little “egg bites” that you bake in the oven. Treat it like a little egg muffin, especially since they freeze well!
You want to make sure to eat enough food to keep your energy up! (But don’t forget a tasty little treat every once in a while too.)
Think about what you’re eating the day before surgery!
Surgery essentially slows your digestive tract down to a halt. I made the mistake of eating a delicious bowl of pho for my last meal before my hysto.
It was incredible, but… all the rice noodles sat pretty heavy in my stomach, and I knew the morning of surgery, it might have been a mistake to eat the food equivalent of Imodium.
Stick to a well-rounded meal, but consider how quickly you digest said meal. You’ve been warned!
Take some time to meal prep a TON of meals that can be frozen.
If you think you have enough, no you don’t.
It took me roughly three weeks to feel comfortable enough to walk around to make myself more than just toast and peanut butter, and my healing has been pretty smooth. My plan is that I focus on something simple like peanut butter + banana on toast for breakfast with a smoothie or decaf coffee, then lentil soup for lunch with vegetables and hummus for snacks, and maybe something like shepherd’s pie for dinner.
If you only need to prepare lunches and dinners in advance, that still means 14 meals for one single week. Take a weekend to make large batches of things in advance! It’s a bit of work, but ordering in or buying pre-made frozen meals can get costly very quickly.
If you need any inspiration, check out sites like Budget Bytes for fantastic and affordable options!
They have tasty soups, single-pan meals, or easy-to-freeze foods that can be excellent and affordable.
On the subject of food, consider what you’ll be able to eat after anesthesia.
Your digestive system slows down to a near halt after anesthesia. Pair that with pain medication and you’ve got a one-way ticket to Constipation City (population: ew).
You should be able to use the washroom normally within 3-5 days, but you can help make this process easier by prioritizing fluids (soup, water, smoothies) and gentle amounts of fibre. Prioritize fluids, light meals, and easy-to-digest fiber.
Don’t overwhelm yourself by eating too much or too richly! Try to focus on frequent, little meals more often than three big ones.
Get ready to sleep on your back a lot.
I am a dedicated side or stomach sleeper 4 lyfe.
Sleeping on my back feels suffocating, but during healing, it’s impossible to comfortably sleep any other way. Try to make it easier on yourself now. Maybe you’d benefit from a body pillow, or a wedge, or just an extra pillow under your knees.
Also, practice getting out of your bed without using your abs now so you aren’t shocked at how tough it is later. You’ve been warned!
Prepare your outfit essentials!
Think: comfy t-shirts, cozy sweaters, easy-to-put-on socks, and underwear with loose elastic bands. Your pelvis and stomach will be so bloated and tender after surgery that even boxers might feel painful.
Don’t forget your shoes! You will be unable to easily bend down to tie your shoes while recovering, so stick to something that is safe and slides on. I went to the hospital with my Crocs, and while I feel a little silly, they were perfect and safer than my flip-flops.
I know you want to wear stuff that makes you look and feel good, but you can focus on the fit afterwards. For now, enjoy the comfy life.
Do a deep clean a couple of days before surgery!
Do the dishes, do your laundry, wash your sheets! (Especially the sheets, because there can be a risk of infection if they’re unwashed and pressing on your incisions while you sleep.)
You won’t be able to comfortably do major cleaning from anywhere for 4-8 weeks, and nothing ruins my mental health like being surrounded by a bunch of chores glaring at me while I ride out pain.
Get domestic, dude!
Every time someone gasps that I’ve never seen The Exorcist, or Severance, or Arcane, I promised myself I’d watch them while recovering from surgery.
Problem: I had this huge list of movies and shows I wanted to watch and pay attention to… but immediately after surgery, I had no brain cells left for focusing.
So I’d start watching a show, find it interesting, then fall asleep (dilaudid is a helluva drug). Or I’d start watching something intense, but with post-surgical anxiety, I found it super overwhelming.
Don’t make the same mistake I did. Make a media menu for all the different vibes you’ll have!
This includes:
- Shows/movies for when you want to fall asleep.
Think reruns of old shows or movies! Did you know Mythbusters has been uploaded for free on YouTube? This is perfect for impromptu napping! Find your comforting show.
- Things you’ve always wanted to get into but never had the time for:
Did you start watching Our Flag Means Death but lost the password to the streaming service once you and your partner broke up? Restart the series and finish it, you scallywag! Have you heard so much about Critical Role but never had the time to watch 2-4 hour long episodes? Now you do!
- Audiobooks, podcasts, or music:
Your eyes will want a break. Stop looking at the little rectangular flashlight that gives us depression and anxiety for a bit. Audiobooks can be easily accessed for free through local libraries and the Libby or Hoopla apps!
If you regularly consume cannabis, taper it down to a stop before surgery.
I am a pretty habitual cannabis fiend. Sure, I don’t smoke shatter out of shitty gravity bong like I used to in my early 20s, but I still tend to enjoy a little bit of low THC/high CBD weed before bed.
While this means my nights are chill and the cartoons are funny, it also means my weed withdrawals can get pretty wicked. For me, it means that I get stomachaches, difficulty sleeping, and am extremely sweaty.
If you’re smoking regularly, make your life easier by dealing with that before surgery rather than piling it onto your future self.
Think of this as a time to reassess your relationship with cannabis, or a tolerance break if you have a healthy but habitual relationship with it that you don’t want to change. For myself, it meant that I got a chance to see how my body felt without weed! Was I still finding it necessary for sleep, or was I good without it? It also gave me an opportunity to switch to non-smoking options in the future, since we can’t pretend that smoking is 100% safe (even cannabis).
Plus, you do not want to smoke weed or take edibles while you’re also taking opioids in recovery! This can be a safety risk, so speak to your surgical team if you have concerns, especially if you use it medically. They will have far better answers for you than I can as a silly little trans man on the internet who reviews tentacle dildos and vibrating fidget spinner butt plugs.
Trust them! They don’t want to narc on you; they just want to keep you safe.
Tips for After Surgery
Do you have a pet? Enlist help from friends or loved ones!
Poor Fido will need to go out for a walk, and this is when the community comes together. Unless you have a backyard where you can let them run free and come back, have a schedule with friends or loved ones where they can come in to walk your pooch for a bit.
Most people want to help you out and will be honoured to come check in on you while you’re recovering.
If you’re not in a position where that’s possible, you can also hire dogwalkers through apps like Rover.
Recovering alone can be very peaceful; you get uninterrupted time to yourself, no schedules, and all the time in the world to enjoy whatever you want to do. However, socializing is a part of our health as humans, and is important to do while you’re stuck inside.
Call some friends to come over and binge-watch a show together (might I recommend Real Housewives). Or maybe have a parallel play date with a friend where you can both quietly read together.
If you’re really stuck lying down, hop on a voice call with friends or FaceTime with family. Finding ways to connect is important!
Avoid stress.
I was watching a lot of news and political commentary the first week of recovery, and that was a baaaad idea.
Feeling anxious makes me clench my stomach, and that’s exactly what you want to avoid. Not only that, but feeling so vulnerable while the world felt so scary left me panicking and paranoid at 1:33 am.
Put it on pause for now. Install some app blockers on your phone, limit the conversations you have with your family on politics or stressful situations, and trust that if there’s anything catastrophic, your loved ones have your back.